I’ve been having a bit of a crappy weekend. Things went, but things never quite went well. I was tired, technology wasn’t working, there’s too much clutter in the house that I just don’t have the energy or motivation to sort out, and I’m feeling a bit sulky because I feel like I’m the only one who does the dishes. Which is partly true, and something I’m slowly working on.
I’m supporting a friend through a particularly rough period involving a narcissistic friend, and it’s bringing a lot to the surface because of how we’ve both been abused.
I mistakenly watched “Abducted in Plain Sight” and watched a narcissistic psychopath paedophile seduce the mother, sexually abuse the father, and then horrifically sexually abuse the daughter, all the while abusing and manipulating everyone.
I think my amazing human is a wee bit depressed – he’s holing up a bit.
Then It messaged me. I just about backflipped. I was not in a headspace to interact with It at all. I could feel myself beginning to escalate into an anxiety attack.
I decided I didn’t have time for that and went straight to Youtube where, bless their algorithms, they had We’re All We Need by Above and Beyond on my front page. After the first 20 seconds of letting the music flow over me, I was in a wonderful state of relaxation (okay, there is probably also a lot of emotional repression going on) and able to manage the less than pleasant interaction.
I’m still a bit antsy, it’s one of those days, but I’m a lot more relaxed than I was.