So as you probably all know by now (or, if you’re a transient blog surfer, you may not know – and also, hi!) I have fibromyalgia. I am also being treated for trigeminal neuralgia. Jury’s out on what’s causing that, I’ve got a referral so let’s see where that takes us.
Fibromyalgia unfortunately involves chronic fatigue. Fatigue is defined as “extreme tiredness resulting from mental or physical exertion or illness” (thanks google dictionary), but for some reason I find that word too … lively. It’s the ‘t’ and the shortness of the word.
I actually prefer the word lethargic, and it’s defined as “a lack of energy and enthusiasm”. While it’s an accurate description, I do indeed have a lack of energy, it doesn’t take into account the severity of that lack. But, still, I like that word, because you can elongate the ‘e’ and the ‘a’ and it becomes a long, slow, exhausted exhale of a word, bringing to mind a sloth on a branch moving in that incredibly slow way of theirs. It sounds how I feel, although fatigue describes it.
I was going to do things today. I got up, I had my cuppa coffee, I took my meds (I’ve doubled my morning tegretol, as the pain from my trigeminal nerve is increasing), and I had my brekkie. I lay around for a bit, read a bit, and then realised I was having difficulty focusing on the words. My eyelids drooped, so I sat up and started sorting out a mindless but fun computer game to play (shield bashy bashy, sword smashy smashy). I was just starting up when everything slowed down. My arms weighed down with lead, my shoulders dropped, and the fatigue hit me in the face like a two handed hammer. Oof. It’s hard work just typing this.
I’d been improving so much with my fibromyalgia and my balancing act that I haven’t felt like this in a wee while. Anxious and depressed and like I don’t want to do anything, sure, but not this whole body-weight drained fatigue. I actually suspect it’s a side effect of the tegretol – I’ve found myself less able to do things lately. Or it could be the pain from the trigeminal neuralgia fatiguing me in a shorter length of time to what I’m used to.
Regardless, I’m now going to put my feet up, put something on Netflix, and doze for the rest of the day. When the fatigue hits, you just gotta rest.