Now that I am through the festive season, I would like to extend my best wishes to all readers – whether you be transient or regular – for the holiday season, and my heartiest congratulations for coming out the other end.
If you could hear my hysterical laughter you’d understand that ‘surviving’ is about the only thing I can lay claim to for this past holiday season. I managed to not yell at anyone. I did politely snap a couple of times – when mum told me not to do a thing with the laptop that had to be done (I do know what I’m doing), and when my amazing human got salty about where we had coffee because we could have had coffee at the coffee place up the road (yes we could have, but we are not, because we are having coffee here, because you said you didn’t care where three times before as we went past cafes and I shoved us all into this one because you were getting grumpy). But overall I managed.
Which is a fucking feat of perseverance if I ever did see one. I went into it burnt out from the impromtu therapy session with mum wherein I was the therapist and helped her unpick and reframe a narrative that has been with her since she was two. The good news is, she’s looking a lot happier, and she’s going to start looking into a therapist. The bad news is it took so much out of me.
Throw me straight into two very long drives back-to-back (only one of which I had to do), my amazing human’s family arriving for two weeks, and the act of ‘running interference’ to ensure my amazing human doesn’t become overwhelmed by his parents, and you have a very stressed out and exhausted lady at the end of it all.
I rarely had time to myself to plug in my headphones and listen to anything. I didn’t have time to do any of my self soothing routines. I was out and about constantly, pushing myself to ensure everything went as smoothly as possible. I was mediator, decider, herder of cats, support … the works. My role in my family has always been as mediator and keeper of the peace. My role in my amazing human’s family is apparently the same, with making decisions (because no one else does) and herding cats on top of that.
I failed miserably at implementing any kind of self care over the holiday period. It’s hard to say ‘no’ when you’re trying to keep everyone else happy – and that’s a holdover from my childhood. If I keep everyone else happy, no one will be grumpy, and I won’t be grumped at. Well it only partly worked. I still got grumped at.
But, in my rambling way, I survived. I made it through. The only incident was the dog eating a part-empty tube of cat laxative and having to clean that off the carpet (she’s fine).
And next year hopefully we won’t have two families combining over the holiday period.